Drifting Away!!

I sometime's feel that we as humans are the most selfish race on this planet. All we really care about is ourself, we show that we really care abut something but inside us its just another way making ourself look good. for example before i came to england, i prayed every night telling ALLAH how much england is important for me and that i would pray everyday if i get the opportunity of studying here! What happened? nothing...all i am left with is a feeling of shame and disgust all my promises have changed into lies. I would be a stupid if i consider these lies as something common, because lying to GOD is like lying to yourself and yes i may say that i have realised how wrong was and from this day onwards i would stand up to my commitment and do as i said. What i have learnt from being independent is to prove yourself, to yourself. What i mean to say is that enough of the look at me i am so nice bullshit!! Someone yesterday told me that if  stand up to your beliefs even your enemies would respect you for that. I consider that to be absolutely true. Why do i desire the best life when i myself don't strive to achieve it. There is a famous quote which says that 'Promises are like babies:  easy to make, hard to deliver.' i'm in the race to prove that its wrong. I will try to make sure that i stand for what i believe in and if i have to be selfish, Than i would be selfish regarding the promises i make. from now on I will try to make one person say, that Asher is a man of his word!

commitment!?!

Even though there aren't a lot of people who read my blog,in fact i'm sure no one will even realise that i have written something new until i tell it to them,I myself feel as i am cheating myself.I felt so comfortable while writing my blogs and always felt as i have achieved something new. My life definitely has changed in the past month i have moved on from being a completely dependent guy who lived with his parents,to a very self dependent guy who moved to another country in order to peruse his dream of getting good education. I wouldn't lie before coming to the UNITED KINGDOM i always took it as something that everyone does and didn't consider it as something that would change my life so much! i have seen a major difference in my life where in Pakistan i used to say that i'm very busy,over here i actually am. Life definitely runs two steps ahead of you and trust me if you are not used to this,its very hard to catch it. I have lived a life where i had my own car,my own cook and driver even a house where i lived alone,but to be honest i have never felt so responsible in my life. I feel much more active there I have this burning desire inside me to explore something new to achieve something much higher than my capabilities . Yes,i do miss my home a lot there hasn't been a single day when i didn't sit at the corner of my room and smile on the wonderful things i have experienced with friends and family.but,I know that this is what i chose,this is what i want the only person who would benefit from all of this is me! and i have to prove it. one more thing that i have realised here is that i have a very diversified personality i can be one or even ten persons at the same time. I know I sound like a lunatic but its true. even though i do get along with everyone i haven't been able to find really good friends i do respect everyone and maybe its my fault maybe i have given them the wrong vibe,maybe i am not good enough,or maybe i am used to the pakistani friendship where if someone calls you a friend they mean it. It would be wrong if i say much because,i am still like a newborn who is learning the different rituals of the world. I know this blog was a little personal will try to touch the different aspects of life and give my opinion on them. and, everyone who is reading this. I Love You guys it just took me sometime to realise it!